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Terrifying Emotional Intensity, Psychic Defense

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    Anecdotal Myers
    Notworthy

    Anecdotal Myers Cadet Citizen II

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    I am going to attempt to be reasonable, without letting my passion get too far ahead of my best point. My goal is to be able to express everything I have learned and what it means to me at this moment, but due to a lack of self-mastery, you will not understand what I am trying to say. So I will be as straightforward as I can without losing my unique linguistic sense of meaning, some points will be blunt, some sharp, and other things will be more cryptic, subtle, or subliminal. The thing is, my ‘best point’ consists of many mediocre/mundane points, some obvious, some forgotten, some hiding, nonetheless all true enough to be taken into account here in this proposal. Due to the contradictory/dual nature of truth and fact though... the multiplicity of points must not be taken out of the context that is thee one singular point I am trying to get a-cross. So bear with me.

    Psychic/Emotional Vampyrism is real. Attention is more valuable than time, but not as valuable as value itself, because attention is awareness in the spatial dimension of time, and value is what deems a thing valuable. Everything you ever do, you are doing in a timed state of mind. The state is the end as well as the means to it, as the state enforces it’s thinking mechanisms, it’s ritual mentality, whatever mode of tradition inhabits the state of mind, is what determines it’s influence on physical activity. The factor of repetition has to be taken into account to recognize where hypnosis comes into play, because rule of state is ritual law. Since our habits account for pretty much everything we ever experience, it goes without saying that hypnosis/habit/ritual/tradition/thinking/muscle memory are all forming the same idea. This is where it is paramount to realize the importance of value. The habits, the means as well as the ends, the goals, the process wholly depends on our sense of value. What we deem valuable as a species, as a community, as individuals, and how we ourselves are perceived as valuable, is what determines unconscious feedback into our experience of reality.

    What people don’t realize the gravity of is how they dilly dally and squander their energy and attention. Emotion is the energy that fuels our sense of meaning. We give ourselves away without a second thought, a doubt, or a question of the reasoning behind it because we have not formed our own individual idea of what is valuable. We go about mechanical actions because it requires little energy, no emotion, like a sedative disguised as a habit. Too many of us are caught in this meaningless trap of mindless mechanics and so we forget what hope meant to us. Hope is a faithful force whitch leads you into abnormal courses of action, if you jump off the edge and into the abyss that there could be something more valuable than there was on the bluff, oh so that’s why they call it a bluff... lol. You need to remember hope as if it was the source, the innocent purity of energetic potency, intense subtle pressure coming out of the fabric of eternity to keep you company when you wake up, because waking up is a lonely process. But this is what I am asking my friends and associates here, is to wake the fuck up and choose choice. It’s lonely because when you wake up completely to the oneness intuition of you as god, the power is too overwhelming to bear alone, which is why we are one two many.

    Than it comes down to being honest with yourself first and foremost. Before you even think about thinking... justly meditate for the majestic sake of your purpose which you desire above all else. The prospects we are facing today are beyond the reason of our old ego. History is malleable to agenda. Secrecy reigns in this world because we are realizing the necessary subconscious dynamic which maintains our ignorance for our own good. We unconsciously store secrets, even away from ourselves, back in subconscious symbol systems, encrypted secret eggs waiting for the right time to crack and hatch. We tend to deny this because we bring everything onto a personal, egotistical level which hinders the maturation of our species. The more we define our own reality, the less we know, thanks to the schizophrenic nature of science, dissection and dissociation. We as a species are going through this shamanic resurrection process in a taboo sort of way, and so it breeds resistance. The body does not want to feel disconnected from the mind, yet that has to happen to invigorate the soul, the triangulation point. Ego is a construct, only a template for the production of emotion which should be utilized according to the structuration of meaning. The ego should not be misused and mistaken as if it was who you are. That would be sacrilegious.

    Finally, we underestimate the power of the sub/unconscious. To put conscious faith in an idea, to impress upon the deep mind that idea fused with coherent emotion not taken personally, but used as a precursor to the generation of life within a thought-form, is to give that idea power and influence over your state of mind. Take time to choose, HONESTLY, what thoughts you want to think, what ideals you want to put stock into, and what beliefs you want to give influence over your logic. Stop letting other people do it for you. Face your fears, help us face our species-wide fears, and let those emotions fuel your purposed passion!!!!!!
    Thanks

    It’s so weird. I’m scared of being mistaken as a dark-hypnotist, so I take precautions to be clumsy and to trip a rhythm on purpose to avoid the hypnotic pull it might produce in someone near me. For instance, I would kick a table by accident, making a loud aggressive, and aggravating noise followed by a cough, and it would seem that I was trying to project an oppressive force into the atmosphere, maybe unconsciously, but even so, I would try to cut that out of the past, and alter the wave function by making it look accidental. I would do this by adding a couple coughs on to the end, to make it look like I was just coughing normally. That would hopefully cancel out the idea that I was projecting a force through 2 consecutive sounds, the table kick and the cough. The coughs added after those two unconsciously projected, oppressive and aggressive sounds would make it all seem like I was just being clumsy and loud.

    On the other hand, I do project negative, killer power onto the two people that are actively trying to mentally control me because they are utterly envious and terrified of the spiritual, intellectual, emotional, and physical gifts I have been blessed with. This is only in self-defense. The fact that I have had to summon this kind of demonic power, though, has left me with a scar. I never wanted to force a kill-spell into anyone’s life, but I will say, I have discovered a whole new power, and it is the dark side, and it is bad, and I see Star Wars in a whole new way now. Thisis why I now fear the dark power that grew within me, I don’t want it to affect anything but the person I reflected it back to. The wrath and rage that he invoked within me is going straight to him as a counter-spell. I still can’t shake the fact that I feel entirely successful and on a new level because of it. This is reinforcing the terror that I feel of my own power, the humbling terror, the more humble I get the more powerful it gets, it’s like I’m sinking into an expansive force, implosion and such.

    I feel like my love has been tainted, but I also feel like I am accepting more and more about the human/magician condition. I am accepting both edges of the sword. Truth is Justice, Justice is Balance.
    It’s challenging sometimes being a magician out in the open, because I fear being misunderstood and my magic being rejected. You want to be able to express yourself from a sacred source of utmost Genuity, but when you are an intensely emotional being, the world is unequipped to handle controlled bursts of intentional emotional expressions. It seems wild and uncultivated to thee uninitiated, when you make a fully conscious decision to be unresponsive at times of total clarity and bliss. When someone looks you in the eye, asks you a question, and you say nothing, but still looking them straight in the eye, fearless, clear, attempting thee most deeply sacred thing a human could be attempting to communicate, and that’s love through the emanation of the vibe, that’s emotional telepathy. People are so stuck on social customs and standards that they have a really difficult time channeling their emotions because they don’t even know where they are coming from in the first place. Individuation is Qi.

    Then there’s the ceaseless synchronicity. The stillness of eternity that stays with you once you break through completely. The prayer that continues forever, that process of cohering, becoming, flourishing, embedding, not necessarily in that order. Thee implications of this amount of concentration and focus is staggering, stunning, shocking, stillness stays.

    A black hole in the eye.
     

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